Rev. Susan Anderson
WEDDING CELEBRANT AND OFFICIANT
MANY BLESSINGS MINISTRY...WEDDING CEREMONY RITUALS
Cherished Memories
Love Story
Many Blessings
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Custom Wedding Ceremony...... RITUALS |
SEEDS FOR CHANGE
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Incorporating ritual into your wedding is one way to elevate the message of
your ceremony as well as to personalize it to your unique relationship.
Rituals can be added any where it seems to best fit in the celebration.
Below are some of the more popular rituals, each which can be custom
designed for the tone you wish to express. This is a starting point of ideas...
you may have a custom or tradition that is not listed which you want to
include, or an idea for something totally new...we are only limited by our
imaginations!
Opening Sacred Space:
To open up the ceremony space as sacred, a special ritual can be
performed.
Honoring Loved Ones:
For dear ones unable to be at the ceremony but who are present in spirit.
This can be included in the opening prayer or placed as a separate section.
This can be tailored to be appropriate for those living or deceased.
Meditative Moment:
The officiant asks everyone to join in a moment of silence or reflective
meditation. This can be to send blessings to the couple, to contemplate the
sacredness of this union, it can be used as a reminder for those guests in
attendance with a spouse or partner to rededicate their own commitment.
Honoring Parents:
Words that acknowledge and honor your parents. Often followed with a
presentation of flowers (typically roses) to the mothers.
Community Vows
The guests are asked to join in a promise to witness the couple's
commitment and to support the bride and groom's new life as a married
couple. This type of guest involvement is more typical of a modern
ceremony. The guests' response of "We will" or "We do" is often followed by
the officiant calling for blessings on the bride and groom as they take their
place in the community as a couple. The officiant may also ask for the
blessings, support and encouragement for the couple by the parents and
siblings. In which case, the family members answer "we do".
Rituals Symbolizing Uniting:
There are a number of rituals that symbolically show the coming together
of each individual into the marriage. Each ritual listed below is a variation
of the manner in which this message is demonstrated.
Unity Candle:
This popular ritual crosses the boundaries of all religious denominations
and spiritual persuasions. The bride and groom (or their mothers) light
two individual candles, whose flames come together later in the ceremony
to form a third flame on the larger, center "unity candle". Usually the
candle lighting is accompanied by a beautiful instrumental piece of music
that is a favorite of the couple.
This is the basic message of each additional ritual listed below, rather than
repeating it each time, I will just indicate the manner in which is varies.
Each can be accompanied by music or inspirational wording describing the
significance of the ritual.
Wine Ceremony:
Using 2 separate carafes of wine and a single wine glass, the bride and
groom pour a little wine from their individual carafe into the single wine
glass, and each then takes a sip from the blended wine.
Sand Ceremony:
The bride and groom each have a container with a different colored sand,
the sand is then blended into one larger container.
Unity Bouquet:
The Mothers of the couple are each escorted into the room with a
bouquet of flowers, which they place in a side vase before being seated,
representing the life of their family member who is going to be married.
The Officiant says that the flowers represent the ways in which each
partner has blossomed and grown, up until this point in their life. The
partners are then instructed to place their flowers together into one
larger vase, creating a very special "unity bouquet". Although each
bouquet, and each life was beautiful alone, they are even more beautiful
together. (The choices selected in this ceremony can have a dramatic
effect. For example, if the groom's family carries baby's breath or
lavender, and the bride's family carries roses, the bouquet is stunning
when combined.
Celebrating Your Uniqueness:
The blending format as described above can be used in any manner
showing a blending of something that is unique to your particular
relationship..some ideas could be created around music, art, gardening,
or any special interest you may share together.
Stone Ceremony:
A small stone is placed on the seat of each guest's chair prior to the
beginning of the ceremony. The minister explains the purpose during the
Welcoming Remarks, asking each guests to hold the stone during the
celebration, placing their well wishes and blessings for the bride and groom
into the stone being held. The couple selects a special container for the
stones to be placed into at the conclusion of the ceremony. This gift will be a
reminder of your wedding day and the loving friends and family who
celebrated along with you.
Any number of variations can be created, rather than using stones, any
small item that is of particular relevance to the couple can be used.
Symbolic Foods
Symbolic foods are placed on the altar or ceremony table, to be mentioned
and shared during the ceremony. In many cultures around the world, sweet
foods are eaten during the wedding ceremony to symbolize the wish for a
sweet marriage. Honey and almonds, dried fruit, or other foods may be
shared by the couple. In some countries, special foods such as nuts and
rice, are given to the bride and groom as a symbol of fertility. Sometimes,
foods representing "four flavors" are given: the bitter, the sweet, the sour
and the savory. These four tastes represent the many different "flavors" of
marriage.
The Blessings of the Hands Ceremony
In many cultures around the world, joining hands is an enduring symbol of
marriage. In this ceremony, the couple each holds up his or her own hand,
and offers it to their partner. Words are spoken which indicate the
symbolism of the hand -- for holding, stroking, giving, sharing, working,
communicating, building, loving, helping etc. As each partner accepts the
hand of the other, he or she is joyfully accepting the many gifts of married
life, and offers the same in return.
The Hand Washing Ceremony
Both Hawaii and Africa subscribe to the tradition of Hand Washing as a
purification ritual before the wedding ceremony begins, and as a prelude the
acceptance of inevitable forgiveness that will be required during the course
of a marriage. The Hand Washing ceremony is a very unique way to add a
special element to your wedding ceremony
Rose Ceremony
Each partner offers the other partner a single rose as a token of their love.
Like the opened blossom of the rose, their hearts are open to the other in
full devotion. The Officiant asks the couple to find a special place in their
home for roses. Each partner then makes a promise to use a rose as a
symbol of their love for one another in the years to come. When words may
be hard to find, the gift of a simple rose will be a symbol that they are still
loved by their partner.
Handfasting or "Tying the Knot"
Handfasting is a general term for the symbolic binding of hands in
matrimony. It is a marriage ritual popular in numerous cultures outside of
the United States. Historically, it was popular with the Celts and various
Pagan communities. Hands are tied together loosely with a decorative sash
or cord to signify the marital union, and then removed. Prayer beads are
sometimes used instead of a sash or cord.
Family Vows Ceremony
When two families are blended, there can be many doubts about the roles
the new partner will play in the children's lives (Will the new partner be
allowed to discipline the children from the previous relationship? Will the
new partner be called "Mom" or "Dad"? Etc.) Each family needs to decide
these things for themselves. After these issues are decided, they can be
stated beautifully and sensitively in a Family Promises ceremony. The
Family Vows Ceremony takes place after the couple's wedding vows.
Some families choose to exchange a piece of jewelry, such as a family ring.
Others give the girls a necklace or earrings and the boys a bracelet or
pendant. There are beautiful Family Medallions made just for this purpose.
Jumping The Broom
"Jumping the broom" is a charming African-American tradition reminiscent of
the historical manner in which couples were united under slavery, when
wedding ceremonies were not allowed. Partners jump over a broom to
signify their new status as a married couple within their community of friends
and family. The broom can be decorated for the wedding day, if you wish.
Breaking The Glass(es)
An ancient Jewish custom that can be incorporated beautifully into interfaith
weddings is the "Breaking of the Glass". At the end of a Jewish wedding,
after the pronouncement of the new status as a married couple, the groom
traditionally stomps on a wine glass wrapped in a cloth napkin or towel. It is
said "Just as it would be impossible to return the glass to its original
condition, the lives of the wedding couple are forever changed." The
popping noise marks the end of the ceremony and the beginning of the new
life together.
Today, many egalitarian couples each have a glass to break at the same
time. (Logistical suggestion -- Wine glasses can be tough to break. Many
couples "cheat" and use lightbulbs instead, which break more easily and
make a loud popping sound.) Many couple save the pieces of their broken
glass as a souvenir. There are companies on-line who will make them into a
beautiful piece of art to display with your names and wedding date.
Butterfly Release Ceremony
According to a Native American Legend... If anyone desires a wish to come
true they must first capture a butterfly and whisper that wish to it. Since a
butterfly can make no sound, the butterfly cannot reveal the wish to anyone
but the Great Spirit who hears and sees all. In gratitude for giving the
beautiful butterfly its freedom, the Great Spirit always grants the wish.
So, according to legend, by making a wish and giving the butterfly its
freedom, the wish will be taken to the heavens and be granted.
Mothers Rose Ceremony
Marriage is a coming together of two lives and a celebration of the love of
two people. But it is more. The love that Groom and Bride feel for one
another is the flowering of a seed that their parents planted in their hearts
years ago. Today, as they embrace one another in their love, so do they
embrace the families which have come together to celebrate with Bride and
Groom on this happy occasion. As a sign of their love for their families, Bride
and Groom would like to offer these roses, to their mothers, as symbols of
their eternal love.
your ceremony as well as to personalize it to your unique relationship.
Rituals can be added any where it seems to best fit in the celebration.
Below are some of the more popular rituals, each which can be custom
designed for the tone you wish to express. This is a starting point of ideas...
you may have a custom or tradition that is not listed which you want to
include, or an idea for something totally new...we are only limited by our
imaginations!
Opening Sacred Space:
To open up the ceremony space as sacred, a special ritual can be
performed.
Honoring Loved Ones:
For dear ones unable to be at the ceremony but who are present in spirit.
This can be included in the opening prayer or placed as a separate section.
This can be tailored to be appropriate for those living or deceased.
Meditative Moment:
The officiant asks everyone to join in a moment of silence or reflective
meditation. This can be to send blessings to the couple, to contemplate the
sacredness of this union, it can be used as a reminder for those guests in
attendance with a spouse or partner to rededicate their own commitment.
Honoring Parents:
Words that acknowledge and honor your parents. Often followed with a
presentation of flowers (typically roses) to the mothers.
Community Vows
The guests are asked to join in a promise to witness the couple's
commitment and to support the bride and groom's new life as a married
couple. This type of guest involvement is more typical of a modern
ceremony. The guests' response of "We will" or "We do" is often followed by
the officiant calling for blessings on the bride and groom as they take their
place in the community as a couple. The officiant may also ask for the
blessings, support and encouragement for the couple by the parents and
siblings. In which case, the family members answer "we do".
Rituals Symbolizing Uniting:
There are a number of rituals that symbolically show the coming together
of each individual into the marriage. Each ritual listed below is a variation
of the manner in which this message is demonstrated.
Unity Candle:
This popular ritual crosses the boundaries of all religious denominations
and spiritual persuasions. The bride and groom (or their mothers) light
two individual candles, whose flames come together later in the ceremony
to form a third flame on the larger, center "unity candle". Usually the
candle lighting is accompanied by a beautiful instrumental piece of music
that is a favorite of the couple.
This is the basic message of each additional ritual listed below, rather than
repeating it each time, I will just indicate the manner in which is varies.
Each can be accompanied by music or inspirational wording describing the
significance of the ritual.
Wine Ceremony:
Using 2 separate carafes of wine and a single wine glass, the bride and
groom pour a little wine from their individual carafe into the single wine
glass, and each then takes a sip from the blended wine.
Sand Ceremony:
The bride and groom each have a container with a different colored sand,
the sand is then blended into one larger container.
Unity Bouquet:
The Mothers of the couple are each escorted into the room with a
bouquet of flowers, which they place in a side vase before being seated,
representing the life of their family member who is going to be married.
The Officiant says that the flowers represent the ways in which each
partner has blossomed and grown, up until this point in their life. The
partners are then instructed to place their flowers together into one
larger vase, creating a very special "unity bouquet". Although each
bouquet, and each life was beautiful alone, they are even more beautiful
together. (The choices selected in this ceremony can have a dramatic
effect. For example, if the groom's family carries baby's breath or
lavender, and the bride's family carries roses, the bouquet is stunning
when combined.
Celebrating Your Uniqueness:
The blending format as described above can be used in any manner
showing a blending of something that is unique to your particular
relationship..some ideas could be created around music, art, gardening,
or any special interest you may share together.
Stone Ceremony:
A small stone is placed on the seat of each guest's chair prior to the
beginning of the ceremony. The minister explains the purpose during the
Welcoming Remarks, asking each guests to hold the stone during the
celebration, placing their well wishes and blessings for the bride and groom
into the stone being held. The couple selects a special container for the
stones to be placed into at the conclusion of the ceremony. This gift will be a
reminder of your wedding day and the loving friends and family who
celebrated along with you.
Any number of variations can be created, rather than using stones, any
small item that is of particular relevance to the couple can be used.
Symbolic Foods
Symbolic foods are placed on the altar or ceremony table, to be mentioned
and shared during the ceremony. In many cultures around the world, sweet
foods are eaten during the wedding ceremony to symbolize the wish for a
sweet marriage. Honey and almonds, dried fruit, or other foods may be
shared by the couple. In some countries, special foods such as nuts and
rice, are given to the bride and groom as a symbol of fertility. Sometimes,
foods representing "four flavors" are given: the bitter, the sweet, the sour
and the savory. These four tastes represent the many different "flavors" of
marriage.
The Blessings of the Hands Ceremony
In many cultures around the world, joining hands is an enduring symbol of
marriage. In this ceremony, the couple each holds up his or her own hand,
and offers it to their partner. Words are spoken which indicate the
symbolism of the hand -- for holding, stroking, giving, sharing, working,
communicating, building, loving, helping etc. As each partner accepts the
hand of the other, he or she is joyfully accepting the many gifts of married
life, and offers the same in return.
The Hand Washing Ceremony
Both Hawaii and Africa subscribe to the tradition of Hand Washing as a
purification ritual before the wedding ceremony begins, and as a prelude the
acceptance of inevitable forgiveness that will be required during the course
of a marriage. The Hand Washing ceremony is a very unique way to add a
special element to your wedding ceremony
Rose Ceremony
Each partner offers the other partner a single rose as a token of their love.
Like the opened blossom of the rose, their hearts are open to the other in
full devotion. The Officiant asks the couple to find a special place in their
home for roses. Each partner then makes a promise to use a rose as a
symbol of their love for one another in the years to come. When words may
be hard to find, the gift of a simple rose will be a symbol that they are still
loved by their partner.
Handfasting or "Tying the Knot"
Handfasting is a general term for the symbolic binding of hands in
matrimony. It is a marriage ritual popular in numerous cultures outside of
the United States. Historically, it was popular with the Celts and various
Pagan communities. Hands are tied together loosely with a decorative sash
or cord to signify the marital union, and then removed. Prayer beads are
sometimes used instead of a sash or cord.
Family Vows Ceremony
When two families are blended, there can be many doubts about the roles
the new partner will play in the children's lives (Will the new partner be
allowed to discipline the children from the previous relationship? Will the
new partner be called "Mom" or "Dad"? Etc.) Each family needs to decide
these things for themselves. After these issues are decided, they can be
stated beautifully and sensitively in a Family Promises ceremony. The
Family Vows Ceremony takes place after the couple's wedding vows.
Some families choose to exchange a piece of jewelry, such as a family ring.
Others give the girls a necklace or earrings and the boys a bracelet or
pendant. There are beautiful Family Medallions made just for this purpose.
Jumping The Broom
"Jumping the broom" is a charming African-American tradition reminiscent of
the historical manner in which couples were united under slavery, when
wedding ceremonies were not allowed. Partners jump over a broom to
signify their new status as a married couple within their community of friends
and family. The broom can be decorated for the wedding day, if you wish.
Breaking The Glass(es)
An ancient Jewish custom that can be incorporated beautifully into interfaith
weddings is the "Breaking of the Glass". At the end of a Jewish wedding,
after the pronouncement of the new status as a married couple, the groom
traditionally stomps on a wine glass wrapped in a cloth napkin or towel. It is
said "Just as it would be impossible to return the glass to its original
condition, the lives of the wedding couple are forever changed." The
popping noise marks the end of the ceremony and the beginning of the new
life together.
Today, many egalitarian couples each have a glass to break at the same
time. (Logistical suggestion -- Wine glasses can be tough to break. Many
couples "cheat" and use lightbulbs instead, which break more easily and
make a loud popping sound.) Many couple save the pieces of their broken
glass as a souvenir. There are companies on-line who will make them into a
beautiful piece of art to display with your names and wedding date.
Butterfly Release Ceremony
According to a Native American Legend... If anyone desires a wish to come
true they must first capture a butterfly and whisper that wish to it. Since a
butterfly can make no sound, the butterfly cannot reveal the wish to anyone
but the Great Spirit who hears and sees all. In gratitude for giving the
beautiful butterfly its freedom, the Great Spirit always grants the wish.
So, according to legend, by making a wish and giving the butterfly its
freedom, the wish will be taken to the heavens and be granted.
Mothers Rose Ceremony
Marriage is a coming together of two lives and a celebration of the love of
two people. But it is more. The love that Groom and Bride feel for one
another is the flowering of a seed that their parents planted in their hearts
years ago. Today, as they embrace one another in their love, so do they
embrace the families which have come together to celebrate with Bride and
Groom on this happy occasion. As a sign of their love for their families, Bride
and Groom would like to offer these roses, to their mothers, as symbols of
their eternal love.